This weeks episode of bckhat is a pointless discussion and here’s why.
Bkchat is this incredible cultural phenomenon in which Uni-dorm conversations are digitised and broadcast on YouTube for the entertainment of others.
Nobody tells the truth about body count.
Boys lie so they seem more experienced.
Girls lie so they seem less experienced.
Do we include oral sex? Because that’s sex to you know?
What about that time it was just the tip? What about that time you were drunk? Oh, that doesn’t count. So technically you’re lying? Exactly.
It’s more complex than a number anyway.
If a girl was in a 10 year relationship she has had some pretty wild sex no doubt. Probably more sex that a girl who has slept with 15 guys once so what’s your beef? Or are you then going to say you want an inexperienced woman who is then magically able to ride the cocky like a bicycle? Lol. Good luck mate.
What this all comes down to at the end of the day is the learned ideas of gender roles. Ideas of the man being the dominant gender (therefore sexually dominant) and the conversation becomes one about competition: “she shouldn’t have had more sex than me” – like sex is some sort of sport lol, clearly some of the Bkchat guys think so. A competitive attitude in a relationship that is meant to be a partnership, harbours incredible issues long term, you need to erase the idea of competition from your mind if you want a successful relationship unless one person is meant to subdue and agree to be subservient lol *sipstea*.
Lucas, everyday chatting shit. Why?
Girls pretend to be prim and proper? So because a girl has had sex with some number of men, whatever number you think is unacceptable, she should wear it on her t-shirt and open her legs for every man? What does that even mean? Redundant.
Lucas said if you respect yourself through religion? Pardon. Boy bye. Self respect is more complex than a list of moral codes that you learn as a child. If self respect was that straight forward, the world we live in would be very different. Having said that, self respect does not equate to denying yourself the sexual pleasures that are an innate part of our humanity, neither does it equate to having sex with multiple partners. It is not black nor white.
When engaging in the discussion of body count, we all love to forget the nature of real life in which shit happens. We like to ignore the complex human process that is growth and learning, often through experience.
What if she slept with someone and thought it was going somewhere and he turned out to be a cunt? What if she was raped? What if she had a warped idea of self image as a child and was bullied into a 10-men shenanigan?
“Oh well that won’t have happened to my wife”
Listen. You are not God. You cannot control what happens to people. And what if she simply doesn’t tell you? (Do you see why comments pertaining to this conversation are redundant.) Dear promiscuous man who wants a Benz Punanin, when you meet the perfect girl, chances are she’ll probably be savage like you because like attracts like and so let’s say she tells you her body count (honestly, she probably won’t but let’s say she did), if you are a real man (as Bkchat guys would say), you are not going anywhere because you will recognise that a human being’s experience, sexual or otherwise are what make them who they are and all those experiences probably make up why you like her.
At the end of the day guys that are concerned about next man having had sex with their girl are immature and insecure. It is not a woman’s duty to protect your ego in as much as our society is built in a manner that encourages men to not learn to manage their emotions and instead pour that weight into women. It is a man’s duty, a real man, to go and evaluate why what someone else says has such a huge effect on his decisions and make a conscious choice to stand by his own beliefs. If you’re a man who is swayed by what your boy said, you’re still a child, self-confidence comes with maturity, grow up.
Coming back to the idea of women being forced to hear the emotional load of men who never learnt to manage their emotions, urges and situations… These promiscuous men probably only want women who have not had sex with a lot of women because it would balance out the equation.
It all comes down to respect for humanity as a whole.
So a guy wants to be hurt when a man he knows has slept with a woman he knows and they see each other in the street surely the means a woman has every right to be equally as hurt, or is it not the same? Because obviously if a guy has a high bodycount too then it’s more likely that a girl will see him on road and be like “rah that’s her man? He’s fucked 5 of my girls.” Slutty guys take a minute to consider your hoeish ways and how they affect your female partner before you start stating you want to put a ring on the Benz Punani while you’ve had every STD in the history of humanity.
In my humble opinion,
All this complex discussion is the simple justification for why sex is made for marriage by God because if you had true respect for yourself and therefore respect your God and therefore respect for your future partner you would not be promiscuous not just because of the spiritual ramifications of sex but also because of the health issues posed by hoeness, in addition to the ego issues that cause discussions like bkchat to be so heated and controversial.
It’s not your fault you’re a hoe and it’s not your fault you think women are cars that lose their value with age and use. Thank God for his grace because we all need forgiveness for the awful attitudes we have acquired over the years because they are chaotic and detrimental to the evolution of humanity. But it’s not our fault. All the music we consume glorifies male prostitution, celebrates females that are freaks in the bed and the idea that women are made for male consumption. Hello car ads!
Let’s just hope that we can all get over this chaos and become more reverent human beings.